Late-Night Musings

It's two in the morning and I'm perched on the often-unused end of my wonderful couch, mindlessly watching Food Network and trying to ignore the rumbling in my stomach (which means I'm probably watching the wrong channel...just turned to Frasier). I know part of the reason is because I fell asleep when I got home and got up around three hours ago. But the biggest part is because I just can't seem to get my mind to stop jumping.

It has been an interesting last few days. I'm doing a 20 day Full Body Cleanse and my diet is limited to raw fruits, vegetables and nuts, basically (and a whole lot of herbs). I wanted to do it because I've been feeling rather whale-ish lately thanks to stress-eating everything in sight and not caring, and I do feel better, but I miss seafood and sweets and other delicious things. Someone offered me hash browns today at work and I had to decline. Then someone else came around with chocolate cake. Twice. It's like I'm wearing a sign.

So...I'm a little on edge about that. I've been digging into Pinterest looking for more recipes that fit into these guidelines so I won't get bored. I can only have so much salad.

In other news...I'm anxiously awaiting the release of my next book, Take One For the Team. I'm so excited...it's always thrilling putting out another work. I'm already working on the sequel. Check out the synopsis:

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Van Roseland is a single mother who doesn't know what it feels like to relax, thanks to a set of twins and mountain of debt given to her by her deceased fiancé. Her boyfriend Joe is a hardworking, loving man who is perfect in just about every way...except financially. Thanks to his spiteful ex, he's unable to contribute as much as either he or Van would like him to. And Van starts wondering more and more if love is enough.

Grant McCallister has always been more successful in business than he's been in his personal life. He's preferred to just remain alone rather than deal with women who only want him for his millions. But after a chance meeting with Van, he begins to think he's finally found what he's been waiting for and resorts to somewhat shady tactics to get close to her, believing she's worth it.

Before too long, Van is on a roller coaster of emotions as her feelings and attraction for Grant deepen that has her questioning everything, especially her own personal morals. Some of her closest relationships are tested and after a while, Van has no idea what she's doing. She loves her some Joe, but she can't help wanting a better life for her children...

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Love or money...classic. :)


Aside from that, it's been kind of a rough week but I'm trying to deal with it best I can. I try to keep in mind that things could always be a lot worse and there are people with way bigger and more serious problems than I've got. I'll admit that doesn't always do the trick but it usually does.

I'm wide awake but I'm suddenly overcome with the urge to just sit here with a can of cashews while watching something that will hopefully make me laugh.

Just Push the Button, Already

So...it's after three in the morning, and I'm sitting up watching the replay of the Clippers/Rockets game like I don't have to work both jobs today, starting in less than four hours. I should have been asleep hours ago, especially knowing that I overslept last week more days than I didn't.

But I'm keyed up and wired right now. Why, you ask? Because I just sent my final draft of my sixth book, Take One For the Team, off to the publisher. I've been working on the final edits this past week (maybe at least part of the reason for all the oversleeping) and I took my time to make sure it's just how I want it. And even though I've had this book written, with the chosen ending in place, for a while now, I agonized over it tonight. I kept going back and forth about if I wanted to end it this way or that way, or delete the entire last chapter altogether. I re-read the same paragraphs over and over, just knowing I was missing something. I was actually biting my nails, which I never do. Before I hit that SEND button, I wanted to be sure it was my idea of perfect.

I get like this whenever I send a book off, but for some reason I was amplified tonight. I don't even know why. But I was actually nervous and was taking deep breath after deep breath, wondering if I should leave it as it was or tweak it one final time. Indecisiveness has always been one of my flaws, and it certainly reared it's ugly head tonight. My son, who had woken up as I worked due to a bad dream, encouraged me after I had calmed him down from that...he suggested I flip a coin, told me how he thought I should end it, then finally just said, "Just make a decision, Mom."

Just push the button, already.

So I did. I trusted my gut that the ending should be left as it was and hit that darn SEND button, actually squealing as I did so. No turning back now (at least, not without a lot of hassle). You'll get to see what I decided on for the ending in a couple of months, hopefully. My son commended me, saying I handled that "like a boss." :)

Now I'm anxious to get going on the sequel. When I wrote the book (the first draft of which was completed in 2012), this was just going to be a standalone story, but the more I read it, the more I realized there was plenty more story left to tell, especially with the way I ended it. And after the way I left my readers hanging in Not By a Long Shot, I listened to the feedback (and the fussing lol) and wrote the sequel to that, Decisions and Consequences. And I've actually already begun the outline for a sequel to Take One For the Team anyway, but now I'm even more eager to write it. I'm excited and I love it.

I should go on to bed. I can work on the sequel later but there's nothing like the feeling of plowing ahead and burying yourself in a project, despite the fact that you're depriving yourself of sleep you need and nourishment you don't want to stop and get. I'm already looking forward to when I can hit that SEND button on another one; there's not many feelings like it.

Golden Girls is on...I'll just take a peek at my sequel notes and then lay down. Maybe.

I LOVE Lazy Weekends...

I don't get many lazy weekends at all. Heck, I don't get many lazy days. Being a single mother working two (plus) jobs, days where I get to do absolutely nothing are at a premium. And I was about due.

So this past Friday, I took the day off from both jobs and asked my sister to take my son to school, which meant I got to SLEEP IN. This is a rare luxury for me and I absolutely, positively loved it. What I didn't mean to do, however, was sleep all day. I didn't get up until five in the afternoon. But oh well...it's not like I had anywhere to be. Other than going to get my son from Boys and Girls Club, I didn't leave the house. I just camped out on my sofa from heaven and played Sims.

Saturday I did go to work, but I only stayed part of the day because I had a previous engagement. But I was still very tired and decided to take a nap beforehand (which I should know better than to do, since I never seem to want to get up from naps) and I ended up not even going to that engagement. I turned my alarm off and rolled right back over. Then after I got up, I made an apple pie before spending the rest of the evening camped out on my heavenly sofa playing Sims.

Today, I overslept and missed church (which I'm not proud of) and I turned on Food Network while I camped out on my God-sent sofa and played Sims. I did get up and do some productive stuff (laundry, dinner) but then I parked it yet again on my sofa-that-should-be-dipped-in-bronze and watched the Spring Baking Championship on Food Network with my son.

It's also been quite a sports weekend...my Hawks knocked out the Nets and moved on to the second round of the NBA playoffs (then we lost in the first game today to the Wizards, but I'm not gonna let that faze me); there was the NFL draft (which I only watched the first round of but I did enjoy it), baseball and hockey (no interest), the Kentucky Derby (even less interest), and the Mayweather-Pacquiao fight (which I certainly wasn't going to pay for and didn't care enough about to go anywhere else to watch). I've enjoyed the NBA playoffs and game 7 of the Clippers/Spurs series was EPIC...hard to believe that was just a first round game. That whole series was intense but I'm glad the Clippers took it...I'm not a Spurs fan, but I respect their professionalism and sportsmanship.

The only thing that would have made this weekend better was if I had a shirtless, ripped chocolate Adonis in my kitchen cooking and feeding it to me, and then rubbing my feet as I basked in the 'itis.' And playing in my hair as we sat on my celestial sofa while I played Sims.

It's been a great weekend. This is the closest I'll get to a vacation for a while, probably, so I'm savoring these last few hours of nothingness before I'm back to the regularly scheduled program at 7:00 AM tomorrow.

Until next time...